The Day the Earth Stood Still
IMAX Has Never Been Less Impressive Starring: Keanu Reeves, Jennifer Connelly By Robert Patrick Director Scott Derrickson’s The Day the Earth Stood Still, a remake of the supposed 1950s sci-fi classic, is conceptually boiling over with thoughts and ideas. Originally conceived as a way for screenwriter Edmund H. North to wax philosophical about the hyper-violent nature of human beings, The Day the Earth Stood Still became canonized as...
Australia
Nicole Kidman OK; Movie Good Starring: Hugh Jackman, Nicole Kidman By Robert Patrick Australia, in a sweeping narrative not unlike Hollywood’s archetypical epics of old, interweaves deep tones of romance with equal part action. The movie’s mastermind, Baz Luhrmann, probably channeled the late director David Lean – famous for such monolithic films as Lawrence of Arabia, Bridge over the River Kwai and Doctor Zhivago – in his...
Nobel Son
Under the Radar and Over the Expectations Starring: Alan Rickman, Bryan Greenburg By Tom Bevis Nobel Son is, to say the least, a roller coaster. It’s difficult to explain what the movie is about without dropping too many spoilers. Everything I had read prior to walking into the screening said it was about Eli Michaelson, a chemistry professor (Alan Rickman) who wins the Nobel Prize at the same time his family is disintegrating,...
Punisher: War Zone
A Lesson in Violence Starring: Ray Stevenson, Dominic West By Tom Bevis In 2004, Marvel Studios said that the follow up to that year’s Punisher starring Thomas Jane would be the fifth Marvel property to become a sequel.Instead, Punisher: War Zone became the latest franchise reboot in the field of comic book adaptations, a trend that started with 2005’s Batman Begins.While these reboots aren’t always bad (2008’s The Incredible Hulk...
Transporter 3
Bringing a Bazooka to a Knife Fight Starring: Jason Statham, Natalya Rudakova By Tom Bevis There’s no question that Jason Statham was made for action movies. He’s got that mean face that can also manage to be suave when needed and a keenly trained body. Not to mention he’s bald. Action movies gotta have bald guys. So, with that in mind, I’m not surprised that this guy keeps showing up in the latest action pictures. Movies like The...
Milk
Revolution at 24 Frames a Second Starring: Sean Penn, James Franco By Robert Patrick Gus Van Sant opens his newest film with Harvey Milk, a gay rights icon, making what seems like an expositive eulogy on an old tape recorder. The device hisses, as if to snake charm Milk into telling his story. “If a bullet should enter my brain, let the bullet destroy every closet door.” Milk demands into the microphone. Here, in a very atypical Van...
Four Christmases
Four Christmases Won’t Bring Santa Back Starring: Vince Vaughn, Reese Witherspoon By Tom Bevis I’ll begin by saying that, despite the title, this is not a Christmas movie. There are none of the trademarks of Christmas movies: gently falling snow, serene music, midgets in stockings, or a fuzzy sense of nostalgia for lost childhoods. In fact, the movie took place in San Francisco, so nix the snow all together, and the only semblances of...
Bolt
Toy Story With Animals Starring: John Travolta, Miley Cyrus By: Andrew Younger “If the dog believes it, the audience believes it.” That declaration, uttered by the television director of the show Bolt (voiced by Inside the Actors’ Studio host and part-time shill for GEICO James Lipton) shoulders the weight of the entire film. If you can stomach that line, please continue reading. If not, I just saved you five minutes of your...
Slumdog Millionaire
Vindicating Ten Years of Who Wants to be a Millionaire Starring: Dev Patel, Freida Pinto By: Andrew Younger Question: Why do bad things happen to good people? Answer: So they can use their misery to answer trivia on a Hindu game show. At least that is the explanation posited in the film Slumdog Millionaire. Jamal Malik (actor Dev Patel), a product of the slums of Mumbai with no formal education, is poised to become the first twenty...
The State of the Horror Genre in America
Written by Tom Bevis A Brief Introduction You know me. And if you don’t, now’s the time to start seriously reconsidering what you’ve been doing with your life. Over the years, due to a life of pillaging through mountains old paperbacks and a dreadfully long Netflix queue, I’ve become something of an expert on the horror genre. This self-diagnosed expertise has led me to do little more with my life than sit around, alone, and plan out...
